It’s widely known that kids and drunk people never lie. However, kids are funny and drunk people… not so much so. Anywho, we all have suffered experienced the brutal honesty of kids. From a simple “but mum, you are ooooold” to a more sophisticated statement like “boogers are poop from your nose, so I don’t eat them”. So, we’ve surfed the internet, the world wide web, in search some of the funny things kids say, aaaaaand…
We must admit we didn’t want to spend too much time on this search, but Jesus, it’s absorbing. From tweet to tweet, from subreddit to subreddit, we ended up having more fun than you’re supposed to have at work.
So let’s get at it, let’s check out some of the funny things kids say!
Hilarious things kids say
1. Different music taste, we guess…
Brilliant things your kids say: Mom, you don’t need to lock your car. No one’s going to steal your CD collection.
— Dr. Susan Key (@susankey_key) January 6, 2018
2. We’ve all been wondered this at some point of our childhood
Alex: Mom, is @ThomasRhett real?
Me: Yes, buddy, he’s a real singer
Alex: How did he get stuck inside the radio? #ThingsKidsSay— Crystal (@Crystal911989) January 15, 2018
3. Hi, Captain Obvious
Oakley has two little red spots on his chest where he’s been itching himself.
Me: what’re those two red spots on your chest?
Oak: mom, those two red spots are my nipples…#thingskidssay #hilarious #hesnotwrong #suchafunnykid #momlife— Ashley Puckett (@ash_puckett) December 29, 2017
4. Priorities
Overhears: Would you rather have a father or a real lightsaber? #starwars #thingskidssay
— Tiwesdaeg (@Just_Tiwesdaeg) December 29, 2017
5. It kind of makes sense, right?
7yr old niece- “If you pretend you are angry that helps you poop, right?” #FunnyThingsKidsSay #StormEmpπre
— Bri Storm ??? (@BriStormBxtch) July 29, 2017
6. Not only Netflix buffers, apparently
2.5 YO, picking up toy that is chirping because the batteries are dying: “It’s buffering.” #kids #funnythingskidssay
— Cherish Elwell (@cherished_life) December 9, 2017
7. Are you pregnant? Do you eat? Well, look at this…
4 yr old: “If there’s a baby in your tummy, doesn’t it get dirty when you eat?” #funnythingskidssay #shesadorable #mybaby
— Samantha P (@SamanthaLP78) January 5, 2018
8. You gotta be grateful
New milestone was hit today when my 2 yr old thanked me for wiping her ass #MomLife #ToddlerLife #pottytraining #funnythingskidssay
— Kerri A Strouse (@Feisty_momma2) July 18, 2017
9. Technically true, but pretty poor
I’m not naked, I’m wearing socks #funnythingskidssay #kidsarethebest
— Baby Smarts (@baby_smarts) October 5, 2017
10. Yucky cheese #concept
Wants toast like mom’s, “I have toast like mom, with yucky cheese” yucky cheese = butter. #toddlertalk #funnythingskidssay
— Bri (@amethystpop) March 18, 2017
11. Aaaaaaaalmost
Cutting & sticking morning
2yo: ‘Pass the ‘blue’ plz Mummy’
*Passes every blue item I can see*
Turns out he meant glue. #FunnyThingsKidsSay— Natashia (@Ntsh_B) February 27, 2017
12. She’ll go far
Just home from shopping and lucy closes the car door with her butt.
“MUMMY I BUMMED IT”
Fantastic loo, thanks ?#funnythingskidssay #lol
— Emma Dickinson ⚡? (@EmzyLucy123) October 25, 2016
13. “You gave them to me”
Mommy, how did you get stripes on your forehead? -3yo #yougavethemtome #parenting #funnythingskidssay #goodthingyourecute
— Katie Roy (@bangbangmason) June 30, 2016
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What’s the most surprising thing your kid ever said to you? Let us know what funny things you’ve heard toddlers or kids say on the comments or on Facebook! And don’t forget to have a look at the rest of our posts!