Worrying is part of being a parent. The moment we have a kid, we know it’s going to be decades of worrying pretty much all the time. However, kids need privacy, their own space where they can feel free and be themselves. It’s not like they aren’t themselves or comfortable around you. It’s just that… come on, you’re an adult, and they are kids. You are… “OLD”.
Yes, we know, it’s a shocker.
Anyway, we are here to tell you how to make your child feel like you respect their privacy. And by “making them feel like you respect their privacy” we mean you’ll actually do it, but you’ll also make sure they notice. Why? Because there’s no better way to gain their trust than to show them you respect their space.
How to Give Your Kids the Privacy They Need
1. Don’t enter their room while they’re not home
Even if it’s to leave some clean socks on their bed. We’re sure whatever you needed to do is something that can wait until they get back from school. In fact, it’s a lot better if you wait until they are back from school, so they can help you do it.
We’ve all been kids and teenagers, and we’ve had our own messy room where we knew where everything was. If you can’t stand that (totally understandable) and want their room not to look like a total mess, ask them to tidy it up themselves and offer to help if necessary. That way, they won’t feel their space has been trespassed.
2. Don’t check their diary
You’ll think it’s obvious if you don’t do it yourself, but it’s something many parents do. If you think your kid is going through something bad, or if you see their marks going down, talk to them, or to their teachers, but don’t check their diary, because if they catch you (and they probably will), it will be really hard for you to regain their trust.
Please remember their diary is their own space, they might use swear words, or write things you wouldn’t even expect them to think about yet, but they wrote them thinking no one would ever read them apart from themselves. If you read it, they could start closing up and stop expressing their emotions.
3. Don’t make fun of them in front of other people
Even if it’s just family. If their room is messy, that’s something you should just talk about just with them. By bringing this kind of topics up during a family dinner, or during a lunch with friends, you’ll just make them feel uncomfortable, like their privacy is being violated.
4. Always knock
And wait until they respond. As kids grow up, they start cherishing their privacy more and more, and even if they are just reading a book, they will thank you for respecting their space by knocking on their door.
Them locking the door doesn’t necessarily mean they are doing something they shouldn’t be doing, it’s just their sense of privacy developing. Just a human thing.
5. Coordinate curfews with other parents
If your child’s friends are allowed to get back home at a certain time, don’t ask yours to arrive a lot earlier. Instead, coordinate with other parents so the whole group of friends gets back home at the same time. That way, they will all be happy, and you’ll still be in control. Win-win!
As always, we hope you find these tips useful! Don’t hesitate to share yours with us on the comments or on Facebook and Twitter!